People Proper Think Birds Are Drones

By Warren Hamilton Category: Modern Myths 28th June 2026

So here's one for you: there's a whole lot of folk who insist birds aren't birds at all. They say sparrows, pigeons and starlings are actually government surveillance drones wearing feathers. I know. Sounds like someone had a curry and panic-browsed the internet.

The whole racket started as a joke in 2017. A young lad called Peter McIndoe made it up as parody to mock conspiracy culture. He didn't mean for people to pack into parks waving placards, but the internet being what it is, the joke grew legs and shoes and now it has merch.

They've had rallies. They sell T-shirts. There's a booklet or two. Journalists turned up, cameras flashed, and some people laughed until their tea came out their nose. Others looked proper convinced, like they'd spent the morning watching pigeons through a pair of binoculars and concluded the birds had an MBA in spying.

What's interesting is how the gag became a kind of mirror. It copies the style of proper dangerous conspiracies but flips it into theatre. Some of the people pushing it are doing social critique-pointing out how daft and quick people are to swallow nonsense. Trouble is, once you set off a conveyor belt of nonsense, it carries everything with it. A joke can start a real argument. It can radicalise. It can sell hats.

I remember seeing some bloke in a deli, coat full of badges, telling anyone who'd listen that pigeons perch on lampposts to recharge. I asked if he'd ever spoken to a pigeon. He didn't. Why would you? They're terrible conversationalists.

So the modern myth is weird because it sits somewhere between satire and genuine belief. It is, in one sense, a performance art piece that accidentally recruited extras. And in another, a reminder that when your mate on socials tells you the sky is a projector, you might want to put the phone down and have a proper look at an actual bird for ten minutes. They really are a mess, but most of them are just birds.